This is the biggest collection, of the world's biggest lies ever told...


The check is in the mail.

I'll respect you in the morning.

I'm from your government, and I am here to help you.

It's only a cold sore.

You get this one, I'll pay next time.

My wife doesn't understand me.

Trust me, I'll take care of everything.

Of course I love you.

I am getting a divorce.

Drinking? Why, no, Officer.

I never inhaled.

It's not the money, it's the principle of the thing.

I never watch television except for PBS.

...but we can still be good friends.

She means nothing to me.

Don't worry, I can go another 20 miles when the gauge is on "empty."

I gave at the office.

Don't worry, he's never bitten anyone.

I'll call you later.

We'll release the upgrade by the end of the year.

Read my lips: no new taxes.

I've never done anything like this before.

Now, I'm going to tell you the truth.

It's supposed to make that noise.

I *love* your new _____!

...then take a left. You can't miss it.

Yes, I did.

Don't worry, it's OK - I'm sterile.

 

oh no, it wasn't just a cold sore!

 

What about:

"No, those jeans don't make you look fat"



??????????????????????????????


Rod.

 

nope, its the fat that makes you look fat .

 

hmmm.. i dont liek that government one before casue i never hear dit... the saying is "hi im from the FAA and im here to help you" now that is one that should be up there...

 

ANYONE from the govwrnment who claims to be there to HELP you is a common fool and a damn liar.........

"don't worry--it's ok--i took my pll already...."

trust me.....i will repay you......


but i only need it for a minute......

 

(car dealer) "its only $xxxx.....oh that was the cash price" L